Tuesday, August 1, 2023

August 1st

7:20 Reverse psychology, with a twist.

7:28 Aud_umbla.

2:35 Internal Afaris. Do you stress out when you think?

Ok i lost a few paragraphs while typing. I must have typed too fast and touched a number of keys i wasn't supposed to in fast sequence. Now i will try and re-write those.

I knew it. That's why i googled it. Thinking and stressing don't mix. Why would your thoughts follow a different path than the one thought in family or school. Why would you try to end up doing things differently when everything is ready for you in this life, if you make the right choices.

Talking like Fred Mercury. I made a few mistakes and wrong choices, always encouraged by others, but i still pay way too much for those. Or like David Gilmour. I don't need their thought control.

I believe you start developing this thinking pattern when you feel something's wrong. It's a natural response. I always felt something was wrong in my life and never knew why. By example i had no idea the math teacher in school was Liz Taylor and made every effort to understand. Only she wasn't teaching, she always had this book she was reading from. As a result, i always had trouble with math and in college i failed the exam several times and i almost got kicked out.

How much stress i put in when i found myself alone in a room in building A of A.I.Cuza University of Iași, in front of a green computer monitor compiling my first programs in Fortran 4 or 77 whatever. Not knowing how to use the libraries, i build from scratch subroutines for multiplying, adding, whatever matrices. I spent many hours alone in front of that terminal until i got it somehow. It was all based on stress.

Pretty much like everything i ever done after. It payed out cause before i left Romania i was making money with programming. Not knowing of course who i was working for. Like the accountant of my last customer was Malin Berggren from Ace of Base.

They know very well that. The enemies who raised me up and brought me all the way here. So they developed this system trying to prevent me thinking. Under the pretext that thinking under stress is not healthy but also maybe because i'm polluting the Universe with my stress thinking or who knows what else pretext, maybe linked to Scientology, they put this feedback on me.

They record and analyze every of my thoughts or maybe just stress level with some sort of wireless e-meter and every time i'm stressing out they start making some noise. And of course, they wouldn't have to use humans for that, if only for precision. They just bring in some stepping robots, maybe from Corvallis, maybe from something else.

I woke up at 5, was feeling sleepy at 8. Exactly when i went to bed he started his morning routine. I fell asleep maybe 5 times until 9:20 when i got out of bed. He left but then she started.

When i went out the first time, under a pretext, i went and looked from the yard in the upstairs apartment. For the first in months the blinds were cracked and i could see a silhouette of woman, looking like a world class actress. Now what would a woman like that do in a place like this, squeaking and stomping for hours.

The temperature outside is 92 degrees and upstairs or under the roof is probably the same but she was doing it for at least 4 hours today or until i wrote the first time (and lost those paragraphs). And then stay all day inside in that inferno with no AC with no car in the spot to move around. My guess is she only showed when i looked, otherwise she goes around the corner or in the next apartment through the attic and the robots are doing the job.

I remember when i first moved here. Upstairs there was a guy resembling Pacepa and maybe Cornel Patrichi, and one day i had an idea and tied a super-magnet to a wire and did rotate it real fast in circles almost touching the ceiling and then i heard a big commotion and i was noise free for two weeks. I guess it was an early version with some magnetic sensors and must have knocked those out.

So i just left, thinking for a walk, buying some stuff from WinCo (had a list). Second thing waiting for me in the alley (will skip the first, too complicated).
Yeah i know the alley is at an angle. The reason they call it Rolling Hills (maybe). A Penske truck flashing yellow lights with a trailer behind. It will be there for several hours, blocking one way of the alley. Penske for pansy. It's really easy to rent one of those and then abuse others with the name of the brand. Whenever wherever is handy.

So i passed it. However in the parking lot at the street. There was this tall enough guy with white hair reminding from behind of Biden. He was patrolling in the lot, i only saw him from behind. So i went on 65 then on Nyberg. But the park's parking lot was full because of the urban camp and i went further to the Community Center.

However just before i reached it i realized i forgot to look at the sign at the door (a couple of empty plastic bottles that set every time i close the door in a different position). So i came back only to see the man again patrolling, like preventing me to get in that parking lot though i never had the intention. But this time i saw him from front. It wasn't Biden.

So i just went back, entered inside, verified a couple of things, in the deafening noise of squeaks and stomps from upstairs and left again.

At the community center there was a guy in the street with a didgeridoo (blower) making a big noise and dust that made me sneeze. After i passed the man, on the wide concrete "trail" i felt quite ok under the shade of the big trees on the bank of the river until i saw the praying mantis. The praying mantis is a tall woman with thin legs and arms i see sometimes in the park. So thin i am afraid she is going to fall at every moment.

With shorts and stuff, her legs are a couple of inches thick at the thighs. As tall as me, she was talking very loud at the phone. "I love you"! "I will see you tomorrow!" she said when i passed her. It is not the first time i thought she was the wife of Henry Kissinger. Only this time i was committed to write and remembered when i got in front of the laptop.
It is .5 miles concrete trail.

Near the other end i met with a guy with a whitish middle size curly hair. He went the other way and i caught up with him when his dog pooped and he didn't pick. Right from behind came the mantis, like to spoil the moment. Later in the parking lot at Fred Meyer (Kroger) i parked next to a blue car that has this SPOILER KING sticker on a side, with LPN PDG something.

WinCo quit years ago to bring spring water. So i have to buy it from somewhere else. Today i went at Fred Meyer and bought 6 gallons of Crystal Geiger with red and blue labels. But the bottles have a different shape. They are long and narrow, figuring a newborn baby. They used to have pieces of tapes figuring handles but those are gone either so you can only grab them by the neck where the lid is. Never would have thought of that but at the Fred Meyer at the check-stand did not want to take them from the cart one by one.

So i called the captain attendant and he said he cannot do the magic thing of multiplying the scanned item by 6. So he took one of them in his arms like one would take a baby and scanned it 5 more times, doing moves like rocking the baby and stuff.

Ok so i left for WinCo. On I5, the show. A guy with again a blue car with the word JeDUN on it. Romanian word Jidan deriving from the Hungarian word Zsido is offensive in Romanian but not in Hungarian. While i was taking the picture the guy with a van saying Student driver on it moved from the lane on the left in front of me and then they all slowed suddenly. I honked and from the right came this big semi, overloaded with something that came half foot into my lane, but i already put the camera away getting ready to exit.
On 72 right before WinCo. First i saw again for the 1000 time the logo. Then i got behind this guy. Pick something brown? But look at the LPN of the guy next to him.
Yeah i know. If you take any of the scenes above separately it wouldn't mean nothing. But when they happen one after other, in sequence, starting with the lack of sleep, they all come in the same pattern.

5:45 Angela told me last night they walked for one hour in the bedroom, after midnight. Back and forth, with no apparent reason.

7:10 I am psychologically dependent on cigarettes. Back in the day i used to take the edge of stress with a cigarette. Since i can't anymore i drink instead. But the effect of drinking is not so immediate and instead lasts for hours.

7:12 About the washer. It works with the new clutch and stuff but the rpm for spinning is much higher and the thing is out of balance, maybe the springs, i just don't know what else to do, it vibrates like crazy.

Should have asked them to replace it which in the end i would do since the thing is 20 years old.

However i learned important things about those. The hose inside and outside was full of slime. As soon as i get behind it i start having chills. I removed the slime, a little bit fell on the floor and now the whole apartment stinks. That stuff is grease and dirt from laundry that escaped detergent and got stock in the plies of the hose and is so virulent it gets you sick right away. I remember at Fox Pointe in Vancouver when i went crazy the first time the apartment was next to the laundry room, at Sussex the same.

This things, no matter the brand, after about one year of using or less got slime in the evacuation hoses and in between the walls of the basket assembly and are a health hazard, even if you keep them in the garage.

7:44 So they stopped upstairs, now there is a big base coming from outside. Can't record it the frequency is too low.

11:22 I was ready to go to bed. I put some earplugs when he climbed the stairs. Now "he" stomps heavily, maybe 2 or 3 times i would with my weight.

11:32 I also noticed he climbed and started when i closed the sliding door so i opened it again and he stopped. It may be the door keeps the noise inside so it can't be heard by others. However now there's some dust in the air. A very loud base started in a car outside.

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